1. Expectation: You can apply all the many many things you learnt in college
After 2 years of complete hard work, constant revision, declining party invitations, festivals, an virtually anything fun, sacrificing your entire life for your precious college work and now you’ve finally passed all your exams with flying colors, you’ve got lot’s of new ideas to bring to the table and to share with everyone.
Reality: You spend the first month coming to terms with the fact that you know absolutely nothing
Despite hoping and praying they’d ask you to complete work you’ve been studying for the past 2 years that you’d absolutely boss, they decide to ask you to sit in an all day meeting so you can find out what’s going on within the business. However despite this fantastic idea, you spend all day sat there wondering what you’re going to have for tea because the business jargon they’re using is like trying to understand a foreign language.
2. Expectation: You’ll impress everyone with your mad skillz
You show up, full of life, full of love, full of new sick ideas about how to make the business go global everyone in the company is gobsmacked and can’t remember how the managed before you. Before you know it, you’re the youngest Vice President in the history of the company.
Reality: Literally no one cares
Your ideas have already been thought of and all the important people are too important to talk to you as long as you get your work done, no one cares.
4. Expectations: You know exactly what your job is
Everything is incredibly straight forward, you come to work, your boss tells you exactly what you need to do and you understand it completely because you’ve just spend the past 2 years studying it.
Reality: You have no idea what you’re doing
The things you’ve been studying for the past 2 years have nothing to do with your new current job and you were day dreaming throughout the introduction and your sat at your desk with no idea what you’re doing.
5. Expectations: The motivation and energy levels of all the employees are sky high
Everyone loves there job and works as hard as they can because they love the company and are passionate about the business being as successful as possible.
Reality: Even employed, important adults slack off
Your faith in human nature is completely ruined when you walk in on your boss watching Hulu in her office at 15.26 on a Wednesday afternoon.
6. Expectations: You’re proud of your work
When people ask what you do for work you proudly smile and tell them everything about it and watch as their jaw drops to the floor and then say ‘i know.’
Reality: Well, it pays the bills
No, your work in your everyday, ordinary, un-enchanting office, isn’t life changing but it pays the bills and they don’t make you work overtime, which is a bonus.
7. Expectations: You have at least one really cute coworker
You kill time flirting, you make cheeky eye contact from across the room. He treats you to coffees sometimes and always has your back.
Reality: There’s nowt spesh
The guy that fixes the printer looks okay-ish from certain angles if the lighting’s right, but apart from that, there’s nowt spesh.
3. Expectation: It’s going to be exactly like The Office
Sure, the workday might be boring, but at least it will be full of crazy antics, everyone will feel like a family, and you might even find your Jim/Pam.
Reality: It’s closer to Sartre’s “No Exit.”
Hell isn’t lit by white-hot flames, but old fluorescent lighting. No one talks to each other in this office unless they have to. You have one friend, and it’s the guy who showed you how to work the copy machine the first day. Sometimes he walks by your desk and says, “Hey, how’s the copy machine treatin’ ya?” It’s great.
